Friday, March 10, 2006

First dates are so gay...

****I started writing this entry on Monday...oops, took a while to finish it!***

Due to Claire's extreme enthusiasm and the lack of more than one vote/ title and the fact that this topic is filling my brain to capacity right now- it wins.

Sooo, if you know me, you know that I refrain from using "gay" as an insult or a term reflecting negativity. You may wonder then why I chose this title and what it refers to. Well, I'll tell you. I am gay, and I just went on a first date. And first dates are very much not gay. What I mean is that the last actual first date I went on was in 2003 with Jess.

This is Jess, she will probably hate that I put this picture of her up here, but it is the only digital picture I have from when we were dating. Jess and I dated for 4 months, and I pretty much lived with her and her two cats the whole time (despite the fact that I am allergic- sometimes I'm crazy!)

Anyway, our "first date" went something like this: We met at a party and we were both interested in each other, at the end of the night Jess asked me for my AIM screen name. Then the next day she IMed me and asked if I wanted to go play pool with her in the Student Center. Not what you would think of as a typical first date, more like two people who might be interested in each other "hanging out". So for my most recent typical first date we have to go allll the way back to the fall of 2001 and a girl named Kirkley.

This is Kirkley.

Now, to be fair, this is Kirkley on her way to Drag Ball senior year (yes, Drag Ball- I went to a women's college, what do you expect?). Kirkley is actually the most "feminine" woman I have ever dated (meaning that we went out on dates, err, a date), and has since gone back to the dark side of dating men. I just enjoy this picture.

Anyway, Kirkley was my first girl crush, and everyone knew that we were interested in each other and everyone was talking about it except for us. So one day she came up to me after class and said, "Everyone is talking about us. We should go to coffee and talk to each other." I of course eeked out a nervous "yes" and was very excited about my date. What I didn't realize was just how much of a date it was.

On my way to meet her my friend Suzy informed me that she had borrowed a cashmere sweater and an expensive sports car from her friend, and that rather than getting coffee as originally planned we were now going out to dinner (or desert or something- I think it was after dinner, but still!).

Kirkley and I had a weird relationship after that 1st date, but the date was one of my best ever. We talked so much that the waitress had to come by multiple times to ask us for our orders and then she left a massive tip which I thought was very cute. At the end of the night she walked me to my dorm and gave me a hug, then I bolted upstairs to gush to my friend Minelly.

So, the point of this quaint trip down memory lane was to highlight that it has been almost 5 years since I have been on a typical first date, and that even then I didn't know it was a first date until like 5 minutes before it started- thus there was no time to stress. In those 5 years I have dated 4 women and with the exception of Jess none of those relationships started with a first date.

Meet Vicky:

(Not her usual dress, she bet against the Steelers and lost)

Vicky and I met a couple of weeks ago and she promptly asked me out. Thus beginning my first date pondering and stress. After she asked me out she was diagnosed with two inner ear infections- so on Monday we went to lunch together. It really wasn't very datey since we both had to get back to work and she was sick.

So, a couple of days ago I e-mail asked her to a movie tonight. As I type she is on her way to pick me up at work and we are going to go see Failure to Launch. So here are my questions (which clearly no one is going to answer in time since she will be here in minutes- but oh well):

  • Should there be a kiss and how will it be initiated?
  • Should I invite her "up" and how do I do that and does that imply that I want to have sex
  • I have more questions but my mind is too muddled to think of them.... I have to spell check and then I'm off....wish me luck :)


Claire said...

ooh, good luck, lil poo!! I was I was there to hear all about it right afterwards like back in the days of the triple...

everyone knows I have no dating advice whatsoever, but I say there should be a kiss!

and let's get those photos up!

Claire said...

Cute!! Now we need the post-date report... said...

Is the cat dressed?

Bueno...q tal? q cita? q tal? Por aqui hay ganas de saber como fue... Besos.

Carol said...


no me llevo bien con los teclados, no es q yo no les guste a ellos, ellos no me gustan a mi!!!