The Lesbian Drama Scene

You might have noticed that I have been M.I.A for a while, or if I did update it was very boring. That is because I have been fully sucked into the lesbian drama scene in Boston, and trust me, there is SO much drama.

Last week I made a chart for my girlfriends from high school to help keep them abreast of my life (just the previous two weeks) it is so complicated that I felt they needed an actual map to help them keep up. If you would like to see said map, shoot me an e-mail at hyperextendedjoints@yahoo.com (side note: I just made that account and somehow I accidentally set the language as Spanish- I am definitely leaving it)...

Drama: I have come to learn that a circle of lesbian friends is a breeding ground for drama, the reason for this is obvious to me, but maybe it is not for you. When you're a lesbian (I use that word more and more lately, even though I usually refer to myself as gay) there is a great chance that your group of buddies includes people that you are interested in dating or are possibly interested in dating you. Because of this, tons of drama ensues. In lesbian relationships there are no boundaries like there are in straight relationships. Generally if a man and woman are friends people always assume there might be something there:

"Harry Burns: no man can be friends with a woman that he finds attractive. He always wants to have sex with her.
Sally Albright: So, you're saying that a man can be friends with a woman he finds unattractive?
Harry Burns: No. You pretty much want to nail 'em too.
Sally Albright: What if THEY don't want to have sex with YOU?
Harry Burns: Doesn't matter because the sex thing is already out there so the friendship is ultimately doomed and that is the end of the story." (When Harry Met Sally, Act I, scene 5)

(I just treated that like a supporting quote in a research paper...sometimes I think im witty...but not really) So, I don't know about the whole unable to be friends thing, but, there is certainly always that sexual element there. With lesbians that is the case with all their relationships, and by that line of reasoning lesbians can only really be friends with gay men. Now with my friends from college there are pretty set boundaries that everyone pretty much understands. But on my football team, we're all just getting to know each other, so it is basically a free for all and drama abounds.

The whole friends and lovers are one and the same thing also complicates the lesbian break-up a lot. When lesbians break up they loose so much, because it is inevitable that your partner has become your best friend. I know this happens with men and women too and I try not to speculate about things I do not have experience with, but I generally think it is more severe in the lesbian relationship.

This is another hurdle I am in the process of dealing with, how to become just friends with my ex... (Because she became my bestfriend and when we broke up I didn't really know what to do with myself for a while.) We talk a lot, she calls me every morning, but have we become friends? Not sure. Will I always hurt a little when I think of us and what happened during our year together? Will her current (who she cheated on with me) ever be able to accept our friendship? If I can ever spend time with the two of them, will it hurt me? I am hopeful that things will work out in the end...I'll keep you posted.


(I am not sure how good this post was...might have been hard to follow...I think my head has just been so full of all this drama that I have a hard time focusing on anything else)

The Lesbian Drama Crew

Fighting Irish

This is my flag football team, The Fighting Irish. We won our first game this past weekend! WOOHOO!

I lost my position as running back and am now officially an outside linebacker. (Yes, that is a big kid position, and yes, as Cam pointed out, I am the smallest person on the team). The top picture is of the Defense...my new team. See the woman in the white in the back center? She is who I was up against most of the time (thats my head poking out in the back). That woman is twice my size and I did such a good job shutting her out on one play that she gave me a disgruntled shove after the play was over. GRRR...I am tough!

I love my team, we all hug every time we leave each other. Lesbians playing football and hugging, so cute!

Sit Down Captain Crunch!

WOOT WOOT Way to be Angels!!! I stayed up way past my bed time to watch this game, and I'll pay for it tomorrow.

I'll be wearing my 2002 Championship shirt out to the clubs tomorrow.

Pictured above is the man of the game: Chone Figgins. Did everyone see his diving catch in the 4th (?). Now that's what I call not having a defeatist attitude. Oh man oh man, a center fielder after my own heart!

Queereoke

Last night after football practice I went out with my team to a bar where "Queereoke" was being held. Yes, it was as much fun as it sounds! We all decided (it wasn't the whole team- I think there were like 6 of us) to sing a song together, and I foolishly mentioned that I thought "Sweet Caroline" would make a good kareoke song. Just in case you were wondering- "Sweet Caroline" is NOT a good kareoke song, the chorus is too high and the song is too slow. But we had fun and that's what counts.

A little later when the bar had gotten more full, the "DJ" decided to sing "Piano Man" by Billy Joel. He was massacring the words and I was singing along and complaining. Linda told me that I should go up and join in, but I just shook off her suggestion. Then he said it, "Anyone who wants to come up and take over for me is welcome." So, with a couple beers in me, I shakily got up and took the stage. The song was only a fourth of the way through so I had a ways to go. Then something amazing happened, people stopped what they were doing and paid attention, and cheered me on, and sang with me- I am not ashamed to admit that I did a good job, and it was really fun. Afterward my teammates all congratulated me and told me I had a good voice and such. Then something weird happened.

Random girls started coming up to me to tell me I had a good voice. Keep in mind that I had come from football practice- I looked grubby, bag shirt and sweat pants with hair pulled back in a frizzy half pony. But somehow, despite my appearance i was being hit on more than I am accustomed to, and one of these girls was relentlessly throwing looks my way.

So if you ever find yourself at a kareoke bar trying to impress the ladies- Billy Joel is where it's at.

And if you find yourself in JP (Jamaica Plaine Massachusetts) on a Thursday night go over to the Midway....it's a wicked good time!

Sunday, Sunday, Sunday....FOOTBALL!

The Fighting Irish (us) vs. Jeanie Johnston, part of the Boston Women's Flag Football Leauge. That's me in the bright blue shorts with the 9 on my shirt. If you have never played on a team sport you should try it. It keeps me sane to know that I have practice coming up and a reason to exercise and get in good shape. Plus I have met a group of amazing women that I love to hang out and talk with. No wonder all those studies show that being involved in sports keeps kids away from drugs and such. Team sports have always been a part of my life and I guess now I realize that they always will.

Three posts in one day! Can you tell how much I missed my blog?

The Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim

If, like me, you are from a baseball loving Orange County family you are excited about the Angeles being in the American League playoffs. What I am not excited about is the perpetuation of the myth that Orange County is in fact just an extension of Los Angeles. Three years ago the Angeles won the world series as the Anaheim Angeles- ANAHEIM, it's in Orange County, it's where Disneyland is, it is NOT a part of Los Angeles County. Now, due to the marketability of "Los Angeles" their name has been changed to the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim.

Every time I see the score of and Angeles game go by under the title LAA I wonder, "What baseball team is in Louisiana?" Now if I saw LAD I would know it was referring to the LA Dodgers. To tell the truth I am more of a Dodgers fan than an Angeles fan, but it is not because they are from exotic LA, it's because I grew up in an Los Angeles County family with a grandmother who loved Tommy Lasorda- I too love Tommy and miss him.

Point being: LA is a city in Los Angeles County which is the county directly North of Orange County where Anaheim is. They are in fact two separate counties. I am tired of saying I am from Orange County and having people respond, "Oh, so LA"...I would rather they say, "Like the O.C.", because that (albeit sad) is a lot more accurate!

"He's cute!" "Yeah, I've got dibs!"

When I was in High School my best friend Meghan used to do that ALL THE TIME. By that I mean, we would meet some guy, we would both think he was cute, and she would tell me that she had dibs on him and that I couldn't try to take him. The point of this post is not to be hard on her- I have long since gotten over what I once considered ridiculous selfishness, not to mention the fact that I used her "dib calling" to justify kissing one of the boys she was dating after having called dibs. I was reminded of this past scenario when I found out I am interested in the same girl as a friend of mine.

Yesterday as my friend Newt and I were leaving football practice (yes, I play flag football) she mentioned that one of our teammates was cute. I agreed with her, then she agreed with herself, then I saw her agree and rose with a "she's very cute", and just for good measure I looked back in her direction. So, although no one called dibs, I find myself in a very similar situation as those from high school. What happens when friends like the same person? If either one of us ends up dating her will it be weird?

...it probably doesn't matter, she probably out of our leagues anyway.